La Vita Del Presto Amore
by Psychicbyinternet
Summary: Joey develops feelings for Yugi, who may or may not share them.  In Chapter 3 Yami is unexpectedly thrown into the situation.
1. Romance at Domino High

Domino High School. A fairly normal high school. The danger starts when you leave it. But even as Yugi, Joey, Tea, Tristan and Miho left their beloved high school, no highwaymen, monsters or gangs were in sight. So, naturally, with not too much to do after school, romance might cross the mind of one in the do-good posse. However, this time it crossed the mind of the most unlikely candidate. It crossed Joey's mind…

"Buh-bye guys!" Tea said as she went to her house.

"Oh, that's where Miho-chan and I leave, too," Tristan gushed, as he walked down another street with Miho Nosaka, his current object of affection.

"Well," Yugi sighed, "I guess it's just you and me."

"And what a tragedy that is," Joey said sarcastically. Then he smiled as if he had a devilishly good idea, "Just us."

Yugi smiled politely and said, "It's good to have some one-on-one bonding time. Right, Joey?"

"Oh, definitely," he snickered.

"Did I miss something?" Yugi asked, "What's so funny?"

"Uh, nothing, Yug," Joey pretended to cough, eliminating the laugh, "I was just, um, wondering, if you would like to get together sometime for some bonding… Somewhere nice."

"Really?! Just us?" Yugi exclaimed, "I'd love that! How about bowling or watching football or pretending to be American when this is clearly a Japanese cartoon?"

"Close."

"Burger Palace or Milkshake Land?"

"Getting warmer."

"Uh, A&W?"

"I was thinking more 'La Vida del Presto Amore.'"

"I can't even pronounce the name of that restaurant."

"It's Italian. Don't worry, they might have burgers on the kids' menu."

"Oh boy! What time?"

"Hmmm… Eight?"

"Well, that's a little past my bedtime, my grandpa's too."

"Your grandpa's, eh?" Joey thought, "Perfect."

"Can't you think of some other time?"

"The only other time I'm free for an evening is tomorrow at seven pm," Joey lied, "Take it or leave it."

"Let me talk to Grandpa," Yugi walked up to his house and knocked on the door. Immediately a large, old head poked out.

"Hello Yugi, Joey! How's school treating you?"

"Ok, but I was wondering if we could have one special bonding evening together tomorrow at seven."

"Seven? You know that's past your bedtime!"

"I know, gramps, but it's a one-time thing, like New Year's, just an outing!"

"Well I suppose if you don't make this staying up late a regular habit, then, sure."

"I promise."

"Ok," Grandpa Moto laughed and added, "I'll see you, Joey, at seven pm sharp tomorrow, and you had better not come fashionably late!"

If looks could kill, Joey was just shot twenty times in the eyes with a black market machine gun. The hot coals suddenly were doused with cold water.

"Goodbye, Joey!" he grinned. Joey left, rubbing his eyes. Despite the eye damage, he had a wonderful feeling about this date. He skipped home.


	2. Wherefore art thou, Joey?

The next day at school, Joey winked at Yugi everytime they caught each other's eye. In the middle of English class, Tea whispered to Tristan, "What mischief are they planning?"

The teacher spoke up and said, "Now let's continue our reading of Shakespeare's 'Romeo and Juliet.' I believe we got to the balcony scene last class."

The young teacher flipped his brown tresses and patrolled the class with his eyes. One hand shot up. "Yes Joey?"

"Can I be Romeo and can Yugi be Juliet?"

Yugi looked mortified, "Joey!" he whispered.

"Um, I guess a boy could play that part. Are you sure?" the English teacher looked worried.

"He is definitely sure," Joey lied for him.

"Uh, okay, let's begin, shall we?" the teacher sighed, "Act II, Scene 2."

Joey's grin subsided and was replaced by a sneer, "He jests at scars that never felt a wound," his face changed again, to sheer ecstasy, "But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?"

He continued the famous monologue with the perfect passion and expression, nearly standing up and walking toward Yugi. He seemed like a completely different person. His Brooklyn accent had become almost British. He read like a Shakespearian actor, with razor sharp diction and perfect movement and facial expression. The people close to him were hit by his constantly spewing spit.

"It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.

Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,

Who is already sick and pale with grief,

That thou, her maid, art far more fair than she.

Be not her maid since she is envious.

Her vestal livery is but sick and green,

And none but fools do wear it. Cast it off!

It is my lady. Oh, it is my love.

Oh, that she knew she were!

She speaks, yet she says nothing. What of that?

Her eye discourses. I will answer it.—

I am too bold. 'Tis not to me she speaks.

Two of the fairest stars in all the heaven,

Having some business, do entreat her eyes

To twinkle in their spheres till they return.

What if her eyes were there, they in her head?

The brightness of her cheek would shame those stars

As daylight doth a lamp."

Cold sweat ran down Yugi's neck.

"Her eye in heaven

Would through the airy region stream so bright

That birds would sing and think it were not night.

See how she leans her cheek upon her hand."

It seemed as if Joey was on the verge of fervent tears.

"Oh, that I were a glove upon that hand that I might touch that cheek!"

There was a long silence. You could hear a pin drop. It seemed long and unbearable.

"Yugi?" the teacher said to the shaking duelist, "Yugi! It's your turn."

"Oh, right! Sorry!" he looked at the book, "Ay me!"

Joey turned away from Yugi. "She speaks!"

He continued delicately:

"O, speak again, bright angel! For thou art

As glorious to this night, being o'er my head,

As is a wingèd messenger of heaven

Unto the white, upturnèd, wondering eyes

Of mortals that fall back to gaze on him

When he bestrides the lazy-puffing clouds

And sails upon the bosom of the air."

Yugi's face had gone completely white at that point, but he had to stop embarrassing himself, so he came in right away, with very little expression, although he was trying hard to act as well as Joey:

"O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo?

Deny thy father and refuse thy name.

Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love,

And I'll no longer be a Capulet."

They continued a little longer until the bell rang and the class was over. It seemed like an eternity to Yugi. Such a long, embarrassing class. And why was Joey acting so strange today? He'd never seen such amazing acting, at school or at a theatre. Why didn't Joey tell him about his secret talent? And why was he suddenly revealing it now, the day after they made arrangements to go to that restaurant?

"This is weirder than Marik," Yugi thought to himself.

"I can hear that, Binky Boy!" Marik yelled in Yugi's inner mind. Yugi jumped in surprise.

"Stop scaring me, Marik! Why are you in town anyway?"

"Evil Council Meeting."

"Oh, I see. And why are you telling me about it?"

"Oh. Oops!" Marik was embarrassed, "Forget what I said. I just like the shopping here."

"Whatever you say, Marik!" Yugi smiled.

Marik left, mumbling to himself, "If only his name was Steve, then he'd be the perfect mind slave! Bahahamuhahahabahamuhaha!"

Yugi shook his head in disgust.


	3. The Date

**I**

The rest of Yugi's day crawled by. He got a ride home, while Joey walked with his friends. Miho smiled daringly at Joey while Tristan fired him an angry look.

Suddenly Tea spoke up, "Okay, spill. What's going on between you and Yugi?"

"Eh, nothing. Nothing! I cracked a few jokes, ok?"

Tea put her hands on her hips.

"Okay, so maybe we're going out tonight and you're not invited!"

"I wonder what rule-breaking activities are planned," Tristan added.

"Swaying Yugi to help him with his schemes, that's awful!" Miho exclaimed, "You should be ashamed of yourself!"

Joey's friends interrogated him about the Romeo and Juliet scene, and why he kept ignoring them.

"Don't worry, guys! It's nothing!" he reassured them as he walked across his apartment's lawn. They gave him skeptical looks as the apartment door swung shut. He exhaled in relief and took the elevator to the third floor. 340. 341. 342. 343. He unlocked it. No one home.

"I guess pops went to the pub early, spending my salary," Joey burned with anger, then sighed, "Calm down. Date time."

Joey rummaged through his closet of stained clothes. White shirt, black pants. He wore those at his grandpa's funeral. He took a shower, put on cologne, got dressed, brushed his teeth, combed his hair and put on his only dress shoes. He glanced at himself in the smashed mirror. Not bad.

He drifted down the elevator, across the lawn, down a few blocks, materialized and stalked up the game shop driveway. A cheerful bell sounded as Joey opened the door.

"Joey, you're here!" Yugi ran toward the door. He stopped abruptly, "Why are you so dressed up?"

Yugi was still in his school uniform as he slipped his shoes on at the door.

"Well, it's a special night," Joey sighed.

"If it's so special, then why didn't Yugi dress up?" Grandpa Yugi eyed him suspiciously.

"Eh, we're going to miss our reservation, Yugi, let's go," Joey said quickly. Then he mumbled, "What a smart ass."

"Ok, bye Grandpa!"

The old man waved meekly as the door slammed shut.

Suddenly Joey realized something, "Damn! No car!" he thought, "But I've got better!"

"Come with me," Joey said.

Yugi and Joey walked to Joey's house where they travelled to the apartment garage. There was a last name above each parking spot. Soon they saw WHEELER above a blue motorbike.

"Hop on," Joey beckoned as Yugi stared in wonder. For the whole ride, Yugi clutched Joey very tightly, scared of falling. They could not speak through the vrooms and pops, but sometimes actions speak louder than words.

They arrived at the restaurant and walked up the sidewalk. The restaurant was in the shape of an enormous valentine heart, with one of cupid's arrows through it. Italian music played loudly from the inside. All of a sudden Joey pulled Yugi aside. He pulled out two fedora hats.

"Put one on," he said. Yugi eyed him in bewilderment but did it anyway. Then Joey pasted a fake goatee to his face and held out a narrow moustache, "That too."

"Joey, what are we doing?" Yugi cried.

With his free hand Joey pulled out two fake ID cards from his inside pocket.

"Yugi, we're underage," he pressed the mustache to Yugi's phalange, "there's no way they'll let us in if we don't look over eighteen."

He shoved the ID card into Yugi's pocket and started walking toward the restaurant.

"Wait a minute?" Yugi exclaimed, "You want me to break the law?"

A few people stared at him. Joey's hand flew to Yugi's mouth. He harshly shushed him.

"Kaiba comes here all the time without a disguise anyway."

"Then why do we need a disguise?"

"Because we're not rich like Kaiba. Just one night, Yugi. One night when you don't listen to what Grandpa says!"

Yugi sighed, "You're sure they have hamburgers?"

"Yup," Joey smiled.

"Ok," he sighed again.

They both walked in and an Italian waiter showed them to a dim, candlelit booth.

"Can I start you off with drinks?" he asked suavely.

"Yes, I'll have a light lager."

"ID?"

Joey flashed the fake birth certificate and Yugi did likewise.

"Yes… sorry, sir."

"And some alcoholic cider for my man over here. Could we get some romantic music at our table?"

"Absolutely," the waiter pulled out a little stereo and switched it on. 'Besame Mucho' played quietly. The waiter left.

"R-romantic music, Joey?" Yugi asked, "What does that restaurant's name mean?"

A different waiter butted in and sang, "La Vita del Presto Amore! The Life of Very Fast Love!

"The Life of Very Fast Love?! What does that mean?" he looked very confused.

"Yugi," Joey sighed. He gulped and took a deep breath, "I love you. That's what this is all about! The Shakespeare! The motorbike! The fancy outfit! The restaurant! The romantic music! I did it all for you!"

"You l-l-l-love me?"

"By god Yugi, my love for you is as large as a million suns, and just as hot! I might explode I love you so much!"

"Um, that's very nice, but I'm a guy, Joey!"

"Why do you think I picked this restaurant?"

Yugi looked at all the other couples sitting at tables; men with men, women with women, a few loners.

"That's right, Yugi, it's a gay bar."

He gasped, "This is kind of well-planned for you, Joey. Do you really mean it?"

"Does it look like I don't?"

"Well, don't tell anyone, but," he sighed, "I feel this way, too. In love, I mean. With you."

"Is this… true love?" Joey leaned in for a kiss. Two drinks were elegantly placed between them.

"Presto!" the waiter cried.

They looked at each other for a few minutes and agreed.

A few rounds later, they were on their way. They barely spoke to each other until they reached Yugi's house.

"It's already past Grandpa's bedtime. Let's go back to the game shop for privacy."

Joey nodded and tried to follow Yugi's spiky crown in the darkness. The glowing moon looked down on their nightly activity. They opened the door whose usually cheerful bell had an eerie quality that night. Yugi's hands were shaking as he tried to steady himself with the shelves filled with cards. As he made his way to the front, one card stood out. It was the Dark Magician. And Yugi could swear that he saw that card wink at him.

Joey's stomach was filled with butterflies as he tried to navigate in the shadows. The room had become a haunted house. The coat rack was a cackling witch. The bell was a shrieking bat. The vending machines were aliens with enormous brains. Worst of all, an iron maiden had come to life and was headed toward him. Joey was too paralyzed to run or scream. Instead he stood in petrified silence.

Yugi's fear was vanishing. He saw the outline of Joey and approached. "So close," he thought.

Joey twitched in fear and he sensed his impending doom. The iron maiden's spikes could easily pierce him right now. Where was Yugi?

Immediately he felt soft lips on his chin. He felt around and touched a smooth hand that quivered a little. Yugi. His lips ascended Joey's face, hitting his lips full on. The sensation was incredible. Joey felt no more fear. He grasped Yugi tightly. He wanted to do unspeakable things. Lick his fingers. Rub his spikes. Suck his nipples. His tongue boldly explored new territory. It was amazing.

Yugi gripped Joey tightly. The kiss could stop if he let go of him. Joey's tongue ventured into him, not too deep, but enough to make a difference. It felt so sensational, neither of them could stop. Their kiss became more and more passionate. They only stopped for a moment to take a tiny gasp of a breath and continued. Through the pleasure, Joey noticed that Yugi was starting to glow but he kept going. He closed his eyes while Yugi's eyes changed in shape.

"AaaaaAAAAAhhhhhhhh!" Yugi unplastered his lips from Joey's.

"Huh?" Joey opened his eyes. He saw Yugi, only taller, more serious and with more highlights. It was Yami Yugi. Joey sizzled in annoyance.

"J-Joey? Was I kissing you?" Yami realized the answer to his question, "Oh dear son of Osiris."

He vomited on the floor, and began a hacking cough, "For Dark Magician's sake!"

Yami switched back to Yugi and Yugi asked politely, "Uh, could you excuse me for a second?"

Joey nodded.

**II**

In the millennium puzzle. Yami and Yugi are standing in the hallway between Yami and Yugi's rooms.

"You're ruining everything!" Yugi cried.

Yami took out toothpaste and a toothbrush and brushed his teeth vigorously. He barely listened to Yugi as he gurgled.

"Why did you even come out?" Yugi asked angrily.

"I wanted to try out that interesting contraption that you sleep on," Yami coughed, "Oh Kuribohsticks!"

He vomited again on the floor in the hallway of their mind. It began to flow into Yugi's room.

"Yami! I just cleaned this room yester…" Yugi stopped as he looked inside. His room looked quite different. Toys still littered the room, except they were all pushed toward the walls, away from the centre. The room had been cleared for a small table. Placed upon it were four objects: a medium-sized picture of Joey, a small bottle of cologne, an empty vase and a deep red rose in front of the display, with specks of water still covering it.

"Interesting re-arranging," Yami remarked. Yugi went white and whipped the door shut.

"I didn't do it!"

Yami threw up one more time and then pried open Yugi's door.

"Hey!" Yugi tried to resist.

Yami saw the strange display and turned toward a nervous Yugi, "You've matured, Yugi," he said, "Don't get me wrong, it's no monster, but it isn't a toy either."

Yami stared at Yugi intently, "You're in love," then he brushed his teeth again, "But, Yugi, did it have to be a man? That was absolutely revolting!"

Yugi sighed as Yami started to vigorously exfoliate his face, "You'll be safe if you don't use the puzzle at your own will anymore. Promise?"

Yami nodded sadly. Yugi turned to leave, when Yami bellowed, "Holy Raigeki Break!"

Yugi raised an eyebrow.

"Sorry," Yami apologized, "Flashback."

"Darn you, Joey," Yami cried, "Darn you to heck!" He then burst into convulsions.

Yugi smirked as he was about to leave, "Hey Yami, by the way, Dark Magician approves."

Yami gaped as Yugi left.

Yugi escaped his body's trance and said, "Hi, Joey!"

"Where were we?" Joey purred.

Joey pulled Yugi to the floor and ripped his shirt off.

"We w-weren't here," Yugi stuttered.

"Hey, we were about to be," Joey insisted.

"I d-don't think I'm ready."

"Yugi, please, let's make music together."

"Jo…"

**III**

"C'mon, everyone's doing it," Solomon heard a voice with an American accent.

Grandpa Moto could hear the dispute from up in his bedroom. He had heard that line so many times in his life. He tore off his blankets and rushed down the hallway, crisply and silently.

"Well, ok," Yugi sighed, "I can't see why Grandpa would object."

_Childish ignorance_, Solomon fumed, _I would never approve_. He flew down the stairs leading to the game shop, like a snowy owl.

Joey smiled and started ripping off his own clothes. Yugi followed suit.

FLIP. Solomon Moto flipped on the lights, seeing his son and Joey, nearly naked. Yugi knew what happened next. Other parents would shriek, growl and throw things. Not gramps. Solomon would not get loud and boisterous. This was his lethally dangerous tone. His non-violent anger seemed more dangerous. Like a corpse that could come alive at any moment or a close friend who could suddenly stab you in the back. It was completely silent for such a long time. Then Grandpa spoke.

"Get the hell out," his voice sliced through the air.

Joey quickly fled with his clothes in hand. He had never seen such a perversion of a kind person before.


End file.
